When it comes to air travelling, safety is first and foremost thing and we are concerned about it more than anything. Still, how many of us actually pay attention to the announcements made by flight attendants? I guess a very little number! Who wants to listen to those boring lines reminding you of school days? What if those announcements were not as boring? What if your flight attendant was a humorous person who knew how to make boring things fun? Air travelling would have been much less stressful for many of us. Here are a few funny announcements made by flight attendants during flights:

  • This red button given here is light for reading. But don’t push the red button in any condition unless you must have to. The red button is ejection button for your seat.”

  • We are sorry about for rough landing we have made. It is not the fault of captain. It is not the fault of co-pilot. It is the Asphalt.”

  • Thank you very much for choosing our airline. We are hoping that you liked giving us business just as we have liked taking you to a ride on our plane.”

  • Please be sure you are taking all your baggage along with you. If you forget anything on board, it will not be returned but will be divided equally between all the flight attendants. Please double check if you are taking your children and spouses with you.”

  • According to weather conditions, our destination is around 45 degrees with some damaged clouds around, but people there will try to get them fixed before we reach. Thank you so much and remember that nobody loves your money more than this Airline does.”

  • You are free to roam around in the plane, but make sure to stay inside till landing. It is quite cold outside. If you tried walking on the airplane wings, it is going to adversely affect the flight.”

  • There might be a number of ways to leave your spouse, but there are only a few ways to leave this airplane so be careful.”

  • The cushions at your seats are designed to be used for floating as well. If we had to make an emergency landing in water, please make sure to take your seat with yourself.”

  • We are happy to make the announcement that we have a few best flight attendants in the air travel industry but the problem is, there is not a single one of them on this flight right now.”

  • We have begun to land. If New York is not your supposed destination for today, it soon is going to be.”

  • Smoking is prohibited on this plane. Though there are some places of the terminal you can smoke at. So the ones who wish to smoke should come after me.”

  • Today, we are going to try to fly to London.”

  • This announcement is for those who are worried about the destination weather. Honolulu is having nice sunny weather and a temperature of 90 degrees but the problem is, the destination is not Honolulu but Nome Alaska that is currently having a temperature of minus 27 degrees and freezing snow.”

  • Smoking is not allowed on the flight, same goes for the washrooms so don’t try to be naughty. If you get caught, a fine of $2,500 will be imposed, and if you owned that much money you’d be flying with another airline”

  • Pilot on the flight asks the passenger before taking off the plane if there is anyone who is flying for the first time. No one responded. He said “nice, probably I’m the only person flying for the first time here.”